Nicole Lilyquist


Saying No as Self Care


“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.”

-Brene Brown


Sometimes saying no is part of self care, but learning to say no can be challenging. You may feel uncomfortable or guilty. Saying no is actually a healthy way to set boundaries and prioritize yourself.

I’ve learned to say no in several aspects of my life, as an artist, a wife and mother, and in relationships.

  • As an artist I’ve had to say no to many requests for free art or events that do not benefit me. I’ve had to carefully sort through opportunities that aren’t really opportunities at all and requests for free or cheap labor. Artists are often taken advantage of, especially when just starting out. Learning to say no elevates my status from hobbyist to entrepreneur. This protects my business and my customers by not devaluing my artwork. I hope to get more in depth on this subject at a later date.

  • As a mother and wife I am often overwhelmed. Sometimes it can be as simple as saying no to making dinner. In the past I have been overwhelmed trying to accomplish everything as a stay at home mom. This quickly led to burn out and I knew I had to make some changes. I let go of the guilt that came along with saying no. My family may not always be getting a home cooked meal but I know that the many other meals I make them are nourishing.

  • Setting boundaries sends a message telling people how I want to be treated. In relationships I have had to say no to unhealthy situations and set boundaries. I have also had to work through my codependency issues in my relationship with my husband.

Saying no has freed up more of my time. As a result I can dedicate more time to self care and making art.

What do you want to say no to? Please leave a comment below!

I have created a FREE ongoing workshop where I offer journaling exercise, art demonstrations, and guidance. Find out more about Emotional Healing Through Art by clicking below.